Today marks five years since I lost my brother.
He wasn’t just family…he was my best friend, my confidant, a true stand-up guy in every sense of the word. I miss him more than words can fully express. There are so many moments when I wish he were still here, when I wish I could just pick up the phone, call him, and share everything I’ve discovered and experienced since he’s been gone.
I often find myself wondering about his final moments…what his last thoughts were, what he saw, what he felt before closing his eyes one last time. It’s a painful curiosity, one that comes from love, from wanting to still be connected in any way I can.
The truth is, I’m still grieving. Some days are easier than others, but the sadness of his absence never fully leaves. I miss his laugh that infectious, hearty laugh that could light up any room. I miss his voice, his silliness, and the way he could make even the heaviest days feel lighter.
God knows it hurts like hell.
But even through the pain, I find joy in remembering him really remembering him for who he was. The stories people tell about him, the kind words they share, and the impact he had on so many lives bring a smile to my face. He wanted to be remembered with love, and he is.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that when we lose someone we love, it’s okay to grieve. It’s okay to sit in the sadness sometimes, to miss them deeply, to have days where the memories flood back with tears. Grieving isn’t a sign of weakness it’s a reflection of the love that was shared.
So today, I honor him.
I honor the laughter, the lessons, the love.
And I remind myself and anyone who might need to hear it…that healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means finding ways to carry them with us, even when they’re no longer physically here.
I love you, bro. Always.
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